If you and your partner have decided to divorce, you may wonder how you can make the transition as smooth as possible for your children. One increasingly popular option is birdnesting.
Birdnesting refers to a setup in which you and your partner keep the family home intact. However, instead of both of you living there at the same time, you rotate living with the children. When one parent is with the children in the family home, the other is at another residence, which you also share. Though this situation may seem difficult to pull off, it can help your children adjust to a new norm.
Nesting can help with a difficult transition
The goal of birdnesting is to cause as little disruption to children’s lives as possible. It also helps to minimize environmental changes for children of divorce as they get used to the idea of their parents separating.
Nesting softens the shock of the news by allowing the kids to remain in a familiar environment while the rest of their family lives evolve. The only real difference children will experience at first is the presence of just one parent in the home instead of both.
Nesting is also beneficial in that it is practical, allowing children to keep their belongings in one home, remain in the same school and keep their same group of friends.
Nesting is only beneficial for so long
Short-term nesting is the healthiest way to help children transition. Ideally, you and your ex will nest for no longer than three months. Any longer than that may unwittingly send the message that you are working on a reconciliation.
Even if you try birdnesting, you still need to properly settle custody or related matters. However, this approach gives you time to figure out the best situation for your family unit as a whole.